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Showing posts with label marah. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marah. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

tunjuk bagus

tak sangka
ada orang marah².
katanya "kalau kau tak suka
kau tulis la kat mana² kau nak.
tunjuk betapa bagusnya kau tu!"

sebenarnya blog ni dibuat dengan 3 tujuan:

1) merakam perkembangan Alice
untuk rujukan akan datang

2) berkongsi harga
- tiket masuk
- barang murah
sebab ini selalunya perkara yang aku google 
bila baca blog orang

3) merakam penghargaan
bila orang buat baik
atau panduan
yang kalau cakap mulut je belum tentu boleh cover semua basic points



aku sendiri bila google
mesti nak tau pasal harga
dan do & don't.
kena tunggu Alice dah 3 tahun
baru boleh masuk Snowalk!


style penulisan aku pulak
simple.
straight to the point.
ayat pendek.
sebaris ayat sebaris maksud.
tak menjela².

ada gambar
(nama pun foto zaza)
bosan kalau tulisan saja
lagi pun aku ada banyak koleksi gambar!
photography style aku pulak
semuanya berlawanan dengan personaliti aku.
gambar² aku bold
loud
alive
hot
super vivid
highly saturated.
pada aku photography satu outlet
untuk lari dari kehidupan hari²
sebab tu aku suka ambik gambar kat punk/skinhead gig.
aku suka energy dia.

gambar lembut²
(selain daripada Alice)
kalau aku ada kat tempat tu
tak de hal
aku boleh shoot FOC
cuma aku tak nak bagi komitment
(post shoot editing memang aku makan masa)
sebab buat masa sekarang ni
cuma photography yang aku boleh buat ikut suka.
blogging sebab duit.
facebooking sebab duit.
bila ada perkara yang kita boleh buat ikut suka
lebih bermakna daripada duit
:)

dan yeah
aku ni jauh daripada alim
tapi aku pun ada tanggungjawab
ke atas gambar² aku
sebab tu aku berat sangat nak ambik gambar perempuan
(dewasa la, gambar Alice tu hari² tak missed!)
banyak pantang larang aku.
buat² faham sudah!

suka hati lu la nak ambik gambar sapa
ada mak jemah kisah?!

bab "tunjuk bagus" tu
mungkin merujuk kepada
aku yang lebih suka fokus pada perkara yang positif.
blog ini bukan untuk emo
bukan untuk kutuk orang
bukan utuk merungut
bukan untuk mengadu nasib malang.
itu bukan aku.

aku rasa kalau aku "bagus"
bila aku ada gear yang puluh² riban
siap telephoto
(macam kelakar pulak sana sini usung bazooka ... kata² orang yang tak mampu) :p
guna prime lens bila low light
(bila tengok National Geographic yang shoot underwater
aku pun konon² kalau guna prime lens
nak ada 1 body untuk setiap prime lens
sebab dalam air tak boleh tukar lens
kena bawak banyak kamera
- pada hal memang tak ada kena mengena pun!) :p
ultra angle lens lak wajib ada fish eye
sebab nak tangkap gambar orang bulat²
dan gambar 1 dunia!


dapat pakai kimono pun dan excited.
nak buat baju raya macam ni boleh tak?
:D

aku rasa kalau aku "bagus"
bila aku pergi holiday panjang dan shopping sakan di Japan, Europe, States
(bukan 3rd world country ya! cewah berlagak!)
dengan Alice, abang, mak, adik beradik dan saudara mara.
kalau pergi sorang² tak nak la aku
macam pergi kerja pulak.
perkara yang baik mestilah dikongsi bersama.
(pada hal kalau keluar dengan family
pergi PD balik hari pun aku dah bersyukur happy sangat²!
dapat jalan² gelak² pergi tesco sama² pun dah bermakna dah hidup ni)
:)

so how?
bila nak tunjuk bagus?!

Thursday, September 5, 2013

parents, do you ever get angry at your kids?

This morning I was so upset with Alice.
Upset?
Or should I put it as 'angry' instead?

Here is the thing.
Evey morning
before going out
I will put some lipstick on
(duh?!).
I try not to do that when Alice is around
because for sure
she will want her turn!

grooming 101
Well, actually there's no real 'applying'
when it comes to Alice and lipstick
since she doesn't know
the secret of popping the lipstick out from the tube
(that's my BIG secret,
don't you dare tell her!).
When she gets her hand on a lipstick
she will undo the cap,
figure out which is lipstick and which is cap,
then she will try to put on some lipstick -
with me constantly reminding her
"Letak sikit saja, banyak² tak cantik".
Which never stops her
to do few rounds of 'donning her lipstick on'.

Being 2 years old
Alice was utterly sure
that the lipstick never did actually touches her lips
so her next blatant move
was to use her index finger
to dig the helpless lipstick out.

Which was why I often told her
" ... don't use your finger, please ..."

archive: Alice 9 months back

That was what happened this morning.
Due to too much dead skin cell (ladies you know what I mean!)
I opted to give it some time
and then only do the lipstick
in the car instead.
With Alice sitting right beside me
(daddy, boleh tak tolong letak Alice dalam toddler car seat dia, please?).

Naturally, she wants her turn.
Sure.
No problem.
Even afterwards, when I asked for the lipstick back,
Alice insists she wants to hold on it
for a wee bit longer.

Oh no!!!
It was when I get out of the car
as we reached the nursery
- after gathering all her stuff at the back of the car
then I realized
Alice got lipstick all over her finger!

It made me so furious!
My lipstick tube was ruined!
There are lipstick smudge on the car seat
(do you know how hard it is to clean lipstick mark off fabric?!).
Alice's finger was stained
and she will cause more mess with that!

So what did I do?!
I sternly told her
I've remind her never to use her finger on lipstick.
I angrily grabbed a tissue
and clean her hand with it.
Then I froze for a few good seconds
to let the her understand how angry I was.

Alice gets it alright.
She's kept her silence,
head down,
no eye contact,
helplessly sitting still.

It was in that exact moment
I remembered
that we as parents can educate/punish our children
but NOT when we're angry.

Are you really sorry?
I asked Alice to say her sorry
(despite the facts
that people say
at this point,
children do not really understand
the concept of being sorry).
Still staring down,
in a small voice
almost can only be herd by herself
Alice lets out a
"I'm sorry, mommy".

We walked to school in silence.
No hand holding.
No body contact.
No jokes.
No laughter.
No hopping.
With tense so thick
ones can almost cut it with a birthday cake knife
(things you'll say when you are a mom!).

*Sigh*

It definitely breaks my heart to see Alice like that.
Before she went in
I gave her a hug
and told her, again
"Don't use finger, mommy marah"
Alice lets out a small
"Hmmmm"


Ok sikit lepas repaired.
No.
It's not about the measly lipstick.
It's about respecting boundaries!

How to get positively angry?
So parents,
have you ever get angry at your kids?
In a positive way?

To me
it is not about the RM30 lipstick
but it is about overstepping boundaries.
I want Alice to know
NO means NO.

I am a dotting mother.
I agree with attached parenting.
I opt for psychological approach
way before the sharp disappointing look
(and caning!).
Nonetheless, there will be times
when I have to be firm
to get the message around.

So, how did YOU handle it? ...

p/s: kenapa lepas marah rasa bersalah pulak?
My intention was noble!
Susahnya nak jadi mak garang yang penyayang
:(
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